I'm sick again. Sinus infection that led me to serious bad headache. Shucks. I hate that. The previous times where these occured, I was on flight. The pain didn't last more than an hour. Thou I did cry because of the pain the previous time, but that was still kinda bearable. But this time, the pain lasted for more than 3 hours.

I was on standby yesterday and not activated. Started to feel a little pain at first. I know what kinda pain was that and I immediately used my nasal spray. A while later the pain got worse and I took 2 panadols. It was so bad that I even tried knocking my head against the wall. No help. I was rolling on my bed screaming but nobody's home. It lasted for another 2 hours before I took another 2 panadols. No help still. I feel like dying.

Whole process lasted for 3 hours with me swallowed 5 panadols. Ah Koh scolded me cos she said that was overdose. Seriously I don't know theres a maximum of 8 in 24 hours. Almost killed myself..

Reported sick for today. For those who know me, you will know that I hate to take mc at work (school is a total different story). I felt so uneasy after reporting sick, but I'm clear of myself that I'm unfit for work.

Went to Dr. Tan this morning. Glad to see his clinic open cos I hate the 24hrs one! He wanted to refer me to the specialist, but I turned him down. He gave me stronger medications this time and increased my usage of nasal spray, and if I still dun recover, going to specialist is a MUST. People... please 'humphhhhhhhh' that I recover!!

Today was spent mostly lying on bed. No energy, no appetite, no mood.

One is weakest when she is sick, be it physically or mentally. Words are to be careful at this time. Too late, when you've been hurt means you've been hurt. Blur says 'you don't have to change youself to suit others'. I know that, but why am I not doing it?

I guess I'm still very affected by the sentance. I know I'm jus a nobody in this world. Nobody to everybody. I know there won't be any difference whether I exist or not.

But........ must you say it out?

Stop putting one down when she is already at the very bottom.